Deep Thoughts on the Issue of Man v Machine
An email conversation between me and "Mitch" from "Detroit" today:
TKV: Last night I bought a new coffee pot.
"Mitch": i was working all night again, AND trying to write my paper. which is actually almost done. tonight i will revise it and sort of put it together. which is funny, because the paper is about how technology influences the writing process - planning, revision, writing, etc.
the article i was reading started talking about how people and computers aren't really separate entities, they become one unit, cyborgs. say what? and how people need to embrace the machines... huh? that's when it took a turn for the weird.
and then he said that his 5 year old son prefers multimedia computer games over the mono-media email, but that if he improved his typing skills, he might be a better emailer.
TKV: So your teacher makes you read stuff about cyborgs? Maybe grad school is cool after all. Actually I don't like cyborgs but whatever. Maybe it's all a clever ruse to prepare us for when the machines really DO take over. Imagine: there will be no more jobs. No more need for cooking. Machines will do everything and we will find ourselves enslaved by them, bowing down to cyborgs and robots every hour because they have become god. And since you'll know ahead of time what this all will be like you will be leading the human's rebellion.
WTF am I talking about, you ask? I have no idea.
"Mitch": sort of like the matrix. when morpheus says we don't know who struck first, but we know the the humans are ones that caused all the destruction. and yet the machines still are in control. very much like that. makes you question your purchase of a coffee pot after all, huh?
or what if the simple machines took over? screws, levers, inclined planes, wheels, wedges and pulleys.
you really don't know what you're talking about, do you?
TKV: My coffee pot is very primitive. It's shiny bad ass black exterior easily fools onlookers into thinking it's very high tech, when in reality it doesn't even have a clock on it. I don't think something with just an on/off switch is really going to take over. Of course when I get home it could have the cats all bowing down before it, so I'll let you know.
If simple machines took over I think we will go back to the bartering system and use sticks and rocks for currency. I don't know why but that's what I would imagine. And everyone would wear Amish clothes.
"Mitch": dude, you think the coffee pot doesn't have some kind of something some stuff in it?? auto shut off? a machine is a machine. i'm totally anti-technology. as i email. not really, though.
if the simple machines take over, they won't just be looking to keep humans down, like planet of the apes. they'll be looking to annihiliate civilization as we know it
TKV: There's no auto-shut off. It was $17.99. You don't get anything for $17.99 except an on/off switch. But you better believe I'm gonna keep my eye on it. I might leave the kitchen light on at night in case it gets any dark ideas.
Do you think the simple machines would be that evil? They're S I M P L E. They're not smart enough to be evil. It would be like if the retards suddenly decided to take over the world. We'd all probably just eat pudding and watch cartoons.
Although… the simple machines could want things to go back to the way they once were (i.e. SIMPLER) and would then annihilate civilization in order to start over with a more basic society. I see your point now…
"Mitch": you spent that much for a no frills coffee pot? you can get those for like $8 at walmart. brand name? not only is it a machine, it's like the kid that gets beat up in the bathroom during class change.
simple machines... well, for one thing, they're so far to right, beyond conservative, they're downright reactionary. imagine being a pulley. you're the shit. but who gets the credit and spotlight? the elevator. sure people say, "man, that's a nice set of wheels!" but they don't mean the wheels, they mean the candy apple red 1969 Dodge Charger that's ON the wheels. or maybe the hubcaps at best - but the actual wheel, who makes the car GO, gets overlooked. they are a jealous lot, and not to be trusted. have you ever tripped over a little rise in the sidewalk? inclined plane.
don't let the simple part fool you.
TKV: It was the cheapest one they had at Target. I refuse to shop at Wal Mart so if I have to go to Target and spend more, so be it. It's a Mr. Coffee brand. It looks nice on my counter next to the toaster. That's important. Actually it's mismatched because the toaster is white.
You are so right about the simple machines. I don't know how I could have overlooked it for so long! You see the building, not the screws that went into holding it together, not the levers and wedges that go into so much dangerous highway repair. Simple machines are a bitter, nasty bunch that I would imagine is getting fed up with being taken for granted. It's like BEYOND technology, like back to the primitive savage machines of old, the ones who rely on their basic animal instincts, who only want to reclaim a world that was once theirs. Dude. I am terrified.
"Mitch": the simple machines are all a bunch of bastards. even the wheel feels eclipsed by the pulley, since the pulley actually has a wheel as a part of itself. they're all jealous, trust me.
TKV: Last night I bought a new coffee pot.
"Mitch": i was working all night again, AND trying to write my paper. which is actually almost done. tonight i will revise it and sort of put it together. which is funny, because the paper is about how technology influences the writing process - planning, revision, writing, etc.
the article i was reading started talking about how people and computers aren't really separate entities, they become one unit, cyborgs. say what? and how people need to embrace the machines... huh? that's when it took a turn for the weird.
and then he said that his 5 year old son prefers multimedia computer games over the mono-media email, but that if he improved his typing skills, he might be a better emailer.
TKV: So your teacher makes you read stuff about cyborgs? Maybe grad school is cool after all. Actually I don't like cyborgs but whatever. Maybe it's all a clever ruse to prepare us for when the machines really DO take over. Imagine: there will be no more jobs. No more need for cooking. Machines will do everything and we will find ourselves enslaved by them, bowing down to cyborgs and robots every hour because they have become god. And since you'll know ahead of time what this all will be like you will be leading the human's rebellion.
WTF am I talking about, you ask? I have no idea.
"Mitch": sort of like the matrix. when morpheus says we don't know who struck first, but we know the the humans are ones that caused all the destruction. and yet the machines still are in control. very much like that. makes you question your purchase of a coffee pot after all, huh?
or what if the simple machines took over? screws, levers, inclined planes, wheels, wedges and pulleys.
you really don't know what you're talking about, do you?
TKV: My coffee pot is very primitive. It's shiny bad ass black exterior easily fools onlookers into thinking it's very high tech, when in reality it doesn't even have a clock on it. I don't think something with just an on/off switch is really going to take over. Of course when I get home it could have the cats all bowing down before it, so I'll let you know.
If simple machines took over I think we will go back to the bartering system and use sticks and rocks for currency. I don't know why but that's what I would imagine. And everyone would wear Amish clothes.
"Mitch": dude, you think the coffee pot doesn't have some kind of something some stuff in it?? auto shut off? a machine is a machine. i'm totally anti-technology. as i email. not really, though.
if the simple machines take over, they won't just be looking to keep humans down, like planet of the apes. they'll be looking to annihiliate civilization as we know it
TKV: There's no auto-shut off. It was $17.99. You don't get anything for $17.99 except an on/off switch. But you better believe I'm gonna keep my eye on it. I might leave the kitchen light on at night in case it gets any dark ideas.
Do you think the simple machines would be that evil? They're S I M P L E. They're not smart enough to be evil. It would be like if the retards suddenly decided to take over the world. We'd all probably just eat pudding and watch cartoons.
Although… the simple machines could want things to go back to the way they once were (i.e. SIMPLER) and would then annihilate civilization in order to start over with a more basic society. I see your point now…
"Mitch": you spent that much for a no frills coffee pot? you can get those for like $8 at walmart. brand name? not only is it a machine, it's like the kid that gets beat up in the bathroom during class change.
simple machines... well, for one thing, they're so far to right, beyond conservative, they're downright reactionary. imagine being a pulley. you're the shit. but who gets the credit and spotlight? the elevator. sure people say, "man, that's a nice set of wheels!" but they don't mean the wheels, they mean the candy apple red 1969 Dodge Charger that's ON the wheels. or maybe the hubcaps at best - but the actual wheel, who makes the car GO, gets overlooked. they are a jealous lot, and not to be trusted. have you ever tripped over a little rise in the sidewalk? inclined plane.
don't let the simple part fool you.
TKV: It was the cheapest one they had at Target. I refuse to shop at Wal Mart so if I have to go to Target and spend more, so be it. It's a Mr. Coffee brand. It looks nice on my counter next to the toaster. That's important. Actually it's mismatched because the toaster is white.
You are so right about the simple machines. I don't know how I could have overlooked it for so long! You see the building, not the screws that went into holding it together, not the levers and wedges that go into so much dangerous highway repair. Simple machines are a bitter, nasty bunch that I would imagine is getting fed up with being taken for granted. It's like BEYOND technology, like back to the primitive savage machines of old, the ones who rely on their basic animal instincts, who only want to reclaim a world that was once theirs. Dude. I am terrified.
"Mitch": the simple machines are all a bunch of bastards. even the wheel feels eclipsed by the pulley, since the pulley actually has a wheel as a part of itself. they're all jealous, trust me.
posted by Kitty Cat Bandit at 3:44 PM
3 Comments:
My roommate and I picked up a microwave from Target a few months back for $23. Say what?! Who ever heard of a microwave for $23? Well, now I know that that was it's way of pulling us into this mechanical uprising. It lured us in with a cheap price-tag and now it bathes our kitchen in a blood-red glow at night. As if that's not nerve-jangling enough, I came home one morning to the display telling me to "CHiLL". The machines are, indeed, on the rise.
Bridget dear, if my sleeping quarters in W Va shall look like the shack and you have a potentially dangerous and scary microwave, I might have to rethink my visit... Just kidding, I need to get the F out of I-o-way.
A $23 microwave is definitely going to have some unresolved issues. Any Freudian psychiatrist can tell you that.
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